It is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma; but perhaps there is a donkey.*

I’ve never really dug politics. In general, politics makes me feel stupid, when I know I am not. It doesn’t help having an incredibly smart opinionated husband (yes, I am biased, thanks for athking!) bolstered by an $18,000 a year education going off on a 20 minute rant carefully constructed monologue, of which I recognized all the words he was using, but they made no sense in that particular order. Kind of like when you order something that has some assembly required. But you open up the instructions, and it’s obvious that it’s been through a few translations on the way back to English. Because obviously, what part of “Lean screw tab for to in bracket slowerly SLOT A adjacent quick in for the TAB B except nut through for to shelf can washer toward construct missing” do you not understand?

Which, BTW? The twitters all through the DNC? All me. The twitters through the RNC? Not all me. While I was out shopping stimulating the economy, he hijacked my twitter.

Anyway, this election year, I’m really trying to GET IT. I really want to understand why I chose the candidate I did, and be able to back up my choice with a more intelligent argument than “BECAUSE… shuddup.”

Because politics and smart choices and cheesy online quizzes all go together sooo smartly…

Way earlier this year, I regaled you with my grape-scented list.

Then I took this.

Your Political Profile:

Overall: 60% Conservative, 40% Liberal

Social Issues: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

Personal Responsibility: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

Fiscal Issues: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

Ethics: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

Defense and Crime: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal

You see why I have more homework to do?

I can’t wait to watch the McCain/OBama debates.

[we pause a moment for those who know Dory to pick up their dropped jaws off the floor in amazement at that last statement]

I’ve never cared this much about politics in all my life. Who is that chick in the mirror?

Rip it, roll it, and punch it, dude. Don’t slip on the confetti.

*This is a play on the quote by Winston Churchill

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